I stumbled upon this online today. I had a variety of reactions.
I know for a fact that more than a few women on AM adjust their weight in their profile to appear lighter than they actually are. All the men I have seen and/or communicated with have told me so. I find it amusing that AM is advertising hot, slender chicks when many women on the site are BBWs. But I suppose those chubby women don't count, do they (said with tongue firmly planted in cheek).
Another thought. When a wife gains a significant amount of weight (I'm not talking due to pregnancy or simply a few pounds), is it a deal breaker? If a husband finds his wife undesirable due to her weight, does he have the right to say anything to her? Hopefully in a constructive manner?
I wonder how many men stray from their wives simply based on a change in weight? It is probably more than just weight, granted, but a significant weight gain can make a woman feel more self-conscious about her body--which can lead to lowered self-esteem and that can lead to sexual inhibitions.
Is it discrimination or are they calling it like they see it?
Luna,
ReplyDeleteYou make some interesting observations / points.
As far as weight in profiles go, I actually support women misrepresenting the truth (lie is a strong word). The reason being is that most Men have no concept of weight. As a young man, I was shocked to see how much SM weighed. Not that she was fat, but I never would have associated her "numbers" and her appearance. So, I say post the weight that you think you look, not what you are.
As far as straying due to weight gain goes, there are probably some who do, but our case was different. SM and I had issues when she had post baby weight, but the issues were her self esteem, which overflowed into her libido. I still loved her and lusted after her, but she did not see herself as sexy. When she got serious about weightless (while I was deployed to some foreign shithole), the pounds fell off, the self esteem skyrocketed and the libido came back.
TTFN
Mr. No Name
I'm sure plenty of women stray because of a fattened husband. I know in this case, my wife has been on my case to lose weight, but I don't think I would ever risk saying something if the tables were reversed. Maybe best to just suggest "doing more things together," like walking, hiking, biking, whatever.
ReplyDeleteBut honestly, I would only be doing it out of health concerns; I don't have a problem with extra weight. In that example ad there, I would have no problem dating either one (granted I would probably card the girl on top, especially if we met online... and this is coming from personal experience).
I can honestly say that if I care for someone, it does not make a whole lot of difference what she looks like.
ReplyDeleteI have explicitly asked women I have met on AM not to send me a picture when we first began to communicate. I wanted to get some kind of idea who they were, what they were like, before I saw what they looked like.
So, do they fudge their weight? I don't know, I have never paid any attention.
Wow. I really appreciate all of you giving such honest comments about this. I had a break from AM and gained some weight betwen the time I left and when I met Drake. I will admit that I didn't change my weight entry on my profile. I still felt as sexy as before, just a bit heavier. Needless to say, it wasn't a deal breaker with Drake! I eventually lost the weight, anyway...
ReplyDelete