I am surrounded by men.
Too many men.
Hell, even my cat is male (albeit neutered).
It's complicated.
Somewhere along the way I lost touch with most of my female friends. The one woman I consider my best female friend has a roommate. They have been living together for at least fifteen years. Unfortunately, that roommate is jealous of the friendship my friend and I have, so we don't get together as often as I would like. My friend also happens to be a co-worker, so I communicate more with her through IM and phone calls than actually seeing her in person. It doesn't help that she and I both telecommute and live 40 minutes away from each other.
Growing up, I always had a group of friends and one or two girls I would call best friends. This lasted through college. Then came marriage and kids and multiple major depressive episodes. I spent years simply trying to survive....to keep my head above water. It was a major ordeal to drag myself to work every day and spend time with my family. I had no energy to invest in cultivating friendships.
I'm paying the price now.
Don't get me wrong. I love the men in my life. However, I long for a close, steady friendship with another woman.
It isn't asking too much, is it?
Maybe it is.
I have lots of female acquaintances. I've spent time with some of these women, but no one really stands out.
Women are so complicated. In my eyes, men are so much easier to get to know, to become friends with.
Now that my moods have stabilized, I have been searching for the perfect female friend.
I haven't found her.
Yet.
LOL I am in a similar situation. Not so much that I don't have female friends but they sure as hell don't know about this part of my life.
ReplyDeleteI know you are looking for someone local but I am here if you ever need a cyber/email buddy.
Kitty
I'm in the same situation!! It sucks, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteVictoria
a.k.a. The Missus
For us guy's girls, making friends (yes, just friends) with men is easier. For female friendships, it's sort of like finding a boyfriend in that you have to find the right chemistry and you have to look for it.
ReplyDeleteI could not have gotten through some of the tough times without my BFFs. Good luck!
I hear you. You have been such a supportive online friend, it's hard to believe that isn't happening in real life. But as we know, it's different! Here for you always.
ReplyDelete-Sassy
I know how you feel. I don't associate much with the women I know because they are too male bashing and expect me to do the same and I can't. So it makes it hard to have female friends.
ReplyDeleteI could NOT survive without the close female friends in my life. I hope that you find that gal pal someday!
ReplyDelete@Kitty - Thanks, Kitty. I appreciate it!
ReplyDelete@Victoria - The Missus! It's nice to hear from you. :-) ...and yeah, it does suck!!
@WestsideTori - You're right, it does involve the right chemistry!
@Sassy - You're a sweetheart!
@trazuredpet - Ouch! Male bashing! That would be hard for me to deal with!
@WaveRider - You're SO lucky!!